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“I‘ll see you later Kasie. I‘ll tell Mike you said bye”
“It’s okay, I have to tell him goodbye in person or he’ll get mad.”
“I‘ll tell him for you, so don‘t worry about it. Just go home.”
“no seriously, where is mike?”
“just go home kasie. Don’t worry, I got it.”

As I’m turning to leave, I see it. There, over my friend‘s shoulder, in the middle of the dance floor, amidst the herd of people, blasting speakers, strobing lights, is Michael, making out with some skank!

I desperately try to convince myself that maybe I made a mistake and that wasn’t Michael, that couldn’t be my boyfriend making out with that trashy ho. Or maybe it was him, but he was merely hugging an old friend he had seen on the dance floor. There was no way my boyfriend would do this! We were supposed to struggle through the rest of college together, then get married and have kids, and name our kids Phil and Lil, and get a nice Lexus for each of us, and we were going to live happily ever after. There was no possible way Michael could do this to our future, right?

I don’t want to know the answer. My chest starts to tighten up. I desperately shove people aside and head outside to get some fresh air. I sit and recount what I just saw in disbelief.
“what’s wrong? is someone picking a fight with you?” asks a rather large and ugly bouncer.
I don‘t even bother lifting my head up and just yell, “No, just my fucking boyfriend was making out with another girl.”
He grimaced and cautiously asks “where are your friends? Where is your ride? Was your boyfriend your ride?”
“I came with my girlfriends and they’ll be out in a minute, OKAY?!”
The bouncer slinks away, leaving me to the mercy of my imagination.

Like a pack of rats, people start scurrying out of the club, hurried out by the bouncers. It was closing. The click clacking of high heels and the chorus of idle talk seems to drown out my anxieties for a second. A familiar figure catches the corner of my eye. I turn and see a stumbling drunken idiot of a man, with his arm around that same girl.

Rage starts to bubble up. All of a sudden my eyes flashed open, wide ,awake and full of wrath. I take a deep breath and just glare for a second. Nothing in my mind was rational anymore, yet nothing had ever been so clear. The only purpose in my life is to hurt it as much as I could. Without thinking, I rush forward. I’m standing face to face with him and all I can do is smile. I slap him, because he made me feel helpless and unwanted, because of all the dreams and fantasies shredded and torn, because I hate him, and I love him.